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#1 2010-01-22 19:03:12
- dimitrisrblue
- Novice
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blonde
hallo everybody
Iam a newbie arround here
So the wellcome post is a joke i found
A blonde went to an appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought.
She went for a complete disguise this time: a brown curly wig, big baggy clothes, and big sunglasses. Then she waited a few days before she approached the salesman again and said, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.
via http://www.funny-city.com
#2 2010-01-23 04:27:36
- soroban
- Power Member
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Re: blonde
.
A blond desperately needs money and resorts to kidnapping.
She goes to a nearby playground and grabs a little boy.
She writes a ransom note:
. . "If you want to see your kid again, put $500 in a paper bag
. . . . . and have him bring it to the first bench in the park.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . A blond"
She gives the note to the boy and sends him home.
Then she sat and waited on the first bench.
A half-hour later, they boy arrives with a paper bag.
In it was the $500 and a note:
. . "How could you do this is a fellow blond?"
.
Last edited by soroban (2010-01-23 04:34:10)
#3 2010-02-19 10:54:37
- misheeru
- Star Member
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Re: blonde
Lmao! wow both of those were pretty good
Of Moons, Birds and Monsters
#5 2010-02-26 00:39:49
- soroban
- Power Member
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Re: blonde
.
A blond calls 911 and says,
"Help! My house is on fire. Bye!"
"Wait!" shouts the dispatcher.
"How do we get to your house?"
There is a pause, then the blond says,
"Um, in a big red truck?"
.
#6 2010-02-27 10:23:25
- Tigeree
- Legendary Member
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Re: blonde
As misheeru would normally say: LMAO! 
People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.
#7 2010-02-27 12:29:43
- misheeru
- Star Member
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Re: blonde
Stealing my LMAO, eh? jk thats awesome tigree, LMAO pwns!!!
its ok its only natural anyway, blonde jokes ftw
lmao
rofl
Last edited by misheeru (2010-02-27 12:33:48)
Of Moons, Birds and Monsters
#8 2010-02-27 12:37:49
- misheeru
- Star Member
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Re: blonde
There once was a magical forest and if you entered it and told a lie you would disappear!!!
A red-head walks in and says "I think I'm pretty" POOF! She disappears
A brunette walks in and says "I think Im smart" nothing happens so she keeps going and makes it out.
A blonde walks in and says "I think-" POOF! She disappears
Of Moons, Birds and Monsters
#9 2010-02-28 12:45:16
- Tigeree
- Legendary Member
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Re: blonde
Hazzah! Victory for Brunettes! LOL! Actually, I'm a bit of everything, but mostly brunette.
That's a good one, misheeru.
People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.
#10 2010-03-02 08:16:59
- misheeru
- Star Member
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Re: blonde
Ah a fellow brunette.
I actually dont no my hair is so dark its about one shade short of black.....
Maybe thats because my black dye faded?
Thats joke was a lie some red-heads are real hotties....
Take Haley Williams for example.. but wait her was dyed that color... oh no was she blonde to begin with??
Of Moons, Birds and Monsters
#11 2010-03-21 01:11:46
- phrontister
- Real Member
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Re: blonde
A blonde was speeding down the road in her little red sports car when a local police officer, who was also blonde, pulled her over, walked up to the car and asked to see the blonde's driver's license.
The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What's a driver's license look like?"
The blonde cop said, "It's rectangular and it's got your picture on it!"
The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small, rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license!", and handed it to the blonde policewoman.
The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. If I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all of this!"
"The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. The bad news is that they do what you tell them to do." - Ted Nelson
#12 2010-03-22 19:29:07
- Tigeree
- Legendary Member
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Re: blonde
LOL! That's a good one, Phro!
To tell ya the truth, I don't know what I am. I'm brunette, but in the sun I'm a ranga (Aussie slang for red-head, btw) And now my peroxide is fading! So I don't know!
People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.
#13 2010-03-24 01:11:54
- phrontister
- Real Member
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Re: blonde
Hi Tigeree,
"ranga"...had to look that up. Apparently it's short for orangutan, an arboreal anthropoid ape (Pongo pygmaeus) of Borneo and Sumatra, having a shaggy reddish-brown coat, very long arms, and no tail.
I wonder if that answers any questions...!
My mental picture of you has changed. You can sketch a composite picture of your face here and maybe you'd like to post the result to give us some idea of what you look like. This computerised approach will protect your anonymity.
Here's a video of a blonde who returns to work after having been out of the workforce for many years: Blonde returns to work. You can tell she hasn't unlearnt the old carriage-return action!
Last edited by phrontister (2010-03-24 02:37:20)
"The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. The bad news is that they do what you tell them to do." - Ted Nelson
#14 2010-03-24 13:28:12
- bobbym
- Administrator
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Re: blonde
Hi phrontister;
I took that composite face test and nearly screamed with horror at the result. I have to apologize to the rest of the human race for having to look at me.
In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them.
Probability is the most important concept in modern science, especially as nobody has the slightest notion what it means.
90% of mathematicians do not understand 90% of currently published mathematics.
#15 2010-03-24 17:38:40
- Tigeree
- Legendary Member
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Re: blonde
I'm sorry Phro, I can't do it! I tried but got stuck on the first question! I don't really have a mental picture of anyone, I just use their avatar's as a reference. And that is my mental picture. BUt for you guys I'll try.
But anyway: Yes! that's right it is short for orangutan!
People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.
#16 2010-03-24 18:21:44
- bobbym
- Administrator
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Re: blonde
Hi phro;
As you can see these things happen to everybody.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dY-SjnbvNQ&NR=1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FEm5Vwr … re=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gq_nNxyt … re=related
In mathematics, you don't understand things. You just get used to them.
Probability is the most important concept in modern science, especially as nobody has the slightest notion what it means.
90% of mathematicians do not understand 90% of currently published mathematics.
#17 2010-04-01 05:21:35
- S.G. Shredmaster
- Power Member
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Re: blonde
A blond was going to Disneyland and saw a sign that said:
Disneyland Left
So she says "Oh, well.", turns around and goes home.
When you're old and your eyes are dim, There ain't no old shep gonna happen again
We'll still go walking down country lanes, I'll sing the same old song
Hear me call your name
#18 2010-04-13 05:04:08
- misheeru
- Star Member
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Re: blonde
LOL, thats hilarious, Shredz.
And almost peed my pants laughing when I took that face test thing that phro posted.
Of Moons, Birds and Monsters