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#1 2005-07-12 19:31:34

ganesh
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 15,230

Limericks

What is a limerick, Mother?
It's a form of verse, said brother
In which lines one and two
Rhyme with five when it's through
And three and four rhyme with each other.

There once was a boy named Reece
He ate and ate until he was obese
He had a big belly
and stuffed it with jelly
and all he wanted for his tummy was peace.

There once was a young boy named Nick
Who by chance was always being kicked
He tried not to fight
For he was smart, kind and bright
So he learned how to run really quick.

There once was an artist named Saint,
Who swallowed some samples of paint.
All shades of the spectrum
Flowed out of his rectum
With a colourful lack of restraint.

There once was a fly on the wall
I wonder why didn't it fall
Because its feet stuck
Or was it just luck
Or does gravity miss things so small?

Last edited by ganesh (2005-07-12 19:32:32)


Character is who you are when no one is looking.

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#2 2005-07-13 03:21:53

Roraborealis
Member
Registered: 2005-03-17
Posts: 1,594

Re: Limericks

There once was a man from New Ealing
Who hopped on a bus bound for Jealing.
It said on the door:
Don't spit on the floor,
So he turned round and spat on the ceiling!


School is practice for the future. Practice makes perfect. But - nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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#3 2005-07-13 09:50:50

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

There was a young lady from Niger.
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger.
They returned from the ride
With the lady inside,
And the smile on the face of the tiger.


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#4 2005-07-13 17:17:15

ganesh
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 15,230

Re: Limericks

There once was a boy from Montreal
Who loved to play basketball
For a team he tried out
But if he made it, I doubt
For you see, he was three feet tall!:D


Character is who you are when no one is looking.

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#5 2005-07-13 18:44:19

Roraborealis
Member
Registered: 2005-03-17
Posts: 1,594

Re: Limericks

There once was a man from Koudou
Who found a large fly in his stew.
Said the waiter: "Don't shout
"Or wave it about
"Quod the rest will be wanting one too!!"


School is practice for the future. Practice makes perfect. But - nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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#6 2005-07-13 21:24:26

mathsyperson
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-22
Posts: 4,900

Re: Limericks

'Tis a favourite project of mine,
A new value of pi to assign.
I would fix it at 3,
For it's simpler, you see,
Than 3 point 1 4 1 5 9

And to make up for that scandalous one...

In China, the Great Tsu Chung Chi,
Is more clever with numbers than we.
"Lo!" he said, "I,
Have a value for pi,
Divide 3 5 5 by 1 1 3."


Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.

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#7 2005-07-13 21:53:16

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

They're all great!

There once was a man from Nantucket,
Who kept all of his cash in a bucket,
But his daughter, named Nan,
Ran away with a man,
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.

But he followed the pair to Pawtucket,
The man and the girl with the bucket;
And he said to the man,
He was welcome to Nan,
But as for the bucket, Pawtucket.


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#8 2005-07-14 19:38:31

justlookingforthemoment
Moderator
Registered: 2005-05-26
Posts: 2,161

Re: Limericks

I know! We can play a game. One person starts off with the first line...and then someone else continues with the second, then someone else with the third etc.

Anyone want to start?

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#9 2005-07-14 19:50:59

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

There once was a Professor called Gizzard
...


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#10 2005-07-14 19:52:23

ganesh
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 15,230

Re: Limericks

who looked much like a lizard


Character is who you are when no one is looking.

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#11 2005-07-14 19:54:55

mathsyperson
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-22
Posts: 4,900

Re: Limericks

There once was a Professor called Gizzard,
Who looked much like a lizard.
But then he went bald...


Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.

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#12 2005-07-15 00:42:39

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

There once was a Professor called Gizzard,
Who looked much like a lizard.
But then he went bald
And forever got called ...


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#13 2005-07-15 01:40:10

mathsyperson
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-22
Posts: 4,900

Re: Limericks

There once was a Professor called Gizzard,
Who looked much like a lizard.
But then he went bald
And forever got called
The man who was cursed by a wizard!


Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.

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#14 2005-07-15 04:53:12

Roraborealis
Member
Registered: 2005-03-17
Posts: 1,594

Re: Limericks

Wow! That's actually very cool!!!


School is practice for the future. Practice makes perfect. But - nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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#15 2005-07-15 10:54:41

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

Good ending, mathsy.

Who wants to start another one?


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#16 2005-07-15 12:53:28

justlookingforthemoment
Moderator
Registered: 2005-05-26
Posts: 2,161

Re: Limericks

There once was an Admin called Rod...

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#17 2005-07-15 17:44:40

mathsyperson
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-22
Posts: 4,900

Re: Limericks

There once was an Admin called Rod,
Whose posts were sometimes quite odd...


Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.

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#18 2005-07-15 21:25:11

Roraborealis
Member
Registered: 2005-03-17
Posts: 1,594

Re: Limericks

There once was an Admin called Rod,
Whose posts were sometimes quite odd
But one day he found...


School is practice for the future. Practice makes perfect. But - nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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#19 2005-07-15 21:53:59

justlookingforthemoment
Moderator
Registered: 2005-05-26
Posts: 2,161

Re: Limericks

There once was an Admin called Rod,
Whose posts were sometimes quite odd
But one day he found
A problem, and frowned

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#20 2005-07-15 22:37:26

mathsyperson
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-22
Posts: 4,900

Re: Limericks

There once was an Admin called Rod,
Whose posts were sometimes quite odd
But one day he found
A problem, and frowned
He realised he smelt just like cod!


Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.

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#21 2005-07-15 23:43:17

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !

*collapses *


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#22 2005-07-15 23:48:31

mathsyperson
Moderator
Registered: 2005-06-22
Posts: 4,900

Re: Limericks

Hee hee, sorry, I couldn't think of another rhyme.

There was once a poet called Ron,
Whose limericks were very long,
The first four were fine,
But then the last line,
Went on and on and on and on and on and on and on!

There was once a limerick Prof,
Who just couldn't finish them off,
He gets the first four,
But then can't get more...

Last edited by mathsyperson (2005-07-16 08:51:20)


Why did the vector cross the road?
It wanted to be normal.

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#23 2005-07-16 05:40:14

Roraborealis
Member
Registered: 2005-03-17
Posts: 1,594

Re: Limericks

HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!


School is practice for the future. Practice makes perfect. But - nobody's perfect, so why practice?

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#24 2005-07-16 11:13:20

MathsIsFun
Administrator
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,555

Re: Limericks

We all know that Zach is a Ferret
...


"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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#25 2005-07-16 13:27:36

Zach
Member
Registered: 2005-03-23
Posts: 2,075

Re: Limericks

We all know that Zach is a Ferret,
He's so much smarter than a pellet,


Boy let me tell you what:
I bet you didn't know it, but I'm a fiddle player too.
And if you'd care to take a dare, I'll make a bet with you.

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