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## #1 2008-03-12 13:58:38

Ricky
Moderator
Registered: 2005-12-04
Posts: 3,791

### Limericks

1.

A woman in liquor production
Owns a still of exquisite construction.
The alcohol boils
Through magnetic coils.
She says that it's "proof by induction."

2.

There was an old man
From Peru, whose lim'ricks all
Look'd like haiku. He

Said with a laugh "I
Cut them in half, the pay is
Much better for two."

3. For those who have played Portal:

There once was a buggy AI
Who decided her subject should die.
When the plot was uncovered,
The subjected discovered
That sadly the cake was a lie.

4.

``````Rob, an odd fellow, designs
Poems of equal-length lines
And he limericks with flair
As his forethought and care
Ensure a word count of 3 9s``````

5. For those who know what a Rick Roll is:

There once was a man named Bertold
Who drank beer when the weather grew cold
As he reached for his cup...
"NEEEEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!!!"
Oh, snap! You just got limerickrolled!

6.

A programmer started to cuss
Because getting to sleep was a fuss
As he lay there in bed
was: while(!asleep()) sheep++;

7.

if(computer.fail==true){
background.setColor(blue);
user.frown();
sys.shutdown();
user.scream("OH, **** YOU");}

"In the real world, this would be a problem.  But in mathematics, we can just define a place where this problem doesn't exist.  So we'll go ahead and do that now..."

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## #2 2008-10-12 16:39:24

All_Is_Number
Member
Registered: 2006-07-10
Posts: 258

### Re: Limericks

Can you spot the limericks?

Last edited by All_Is_Number (2008-10-12 16:42:05)

You can shear a sheep many times but skin him only once.

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## #3 2008-10-12 18:09:26

Tigeree
Member
Registered: 2005-11-19
Posts: 13,883

### Re: Limericks

LOL! Very clever u 2!  XD

People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.

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## #4 2008-10-13 11:56:50

Chewy
Member
Registered: 2008-08-07
Posts: 67

### Re: Limericks

Those are funny limericks ! Yes, clever !

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## #5 2008-10-13 13:17:15

MathsIsFun
Registered: 2005-01-21
Posts: 7,684

### Re: Limericks

Most excellent!

Not math-related, but I love the Nantucket series:

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
But his daughter, named Nan,
Ran away with a man
And as for the bucket, Nantucket.

But he followed the pair to Pawtucket,
The man and the girl with the bucket;
And he said to the man,
He was welcome to Nan,
But as for the bucket, Pawtucket.

Then the pair followed Pa to Manhasset,
Where he still held the cash as an asset,
But Nan and the man
Stole the money and ran,
And as for the bucket, Manhasset.

"The physicists defer only to mathematicians, and the mathematicians defer only to God ..."  - Leon M. Lederman

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## #6 2008-10-13 21:08:54

Tigeree
Member
Registered: 2005-11-19
Posts: 13,883

### Re: Limericks

yeah go Nantucket!
There is a major town in Ireland called Limericks, by the way.

Last edited by Tigeree (2008-10-13 21:09:21)

People don't notice whether it's winter or summer when they're happy.
~ Anton Chekhov
Cheer up, emo kid.

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## #7 2009-05-17 06:47:48

LorraineBR
Member
Registered: 2009-05-13
Posts: 33

### Re: Limericks

dey r relly funny. i specialy like de sheep 1
nd its called Limrick nd its both a county and a city:)

Theres only 10 type of people in the world
Those that understand binary
And those that dont

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## #8 2009-05-17 09:19:43

JaneFairfax
Member
Registered: 2007-02-23
Posts: 6,868

### Re: Limericks

 There once was a prophet from Fife
Who predicted the end of his life.
When the moment drew near
He showed no sign of fear
As he stabbèd himself with a knife.

PS: Pronounce stabbèd as two syllables to maintain the metre.

Last edited by JaneFairfax (2009-05-17 09:26:45)

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## #9 2009-05-29 13:56:52

jimmyR
Member
Registered: 2009-05-29
Posts: 143

### Re: Limericks

Ricky wrote:

A woman in liquor production
Owns a still of exquisite construction.
The alcohol boils
Through magnetic coils.
She says that it's "proof by induction."

this is pretty good, especially the "proof by induction"
thanks,

jimmyR

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## #10 2009-06-07 19:29:27

ganesh
Registered: 2005-06-28
Posts: 23,811

### Re: Limericks

Great ones, Ricky!

It is no good to try to stop knowledge from going forward. Ignorance is never better than knowledge - Enrico Fermi.

Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.

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## #11 2009-06-17 00:54:25

soroban
Member
Registered: 2007-03-09
Posts: 452

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## #12 2009-07-12 00:18:20

k1n0m1
Member
Registered: 2009-07-11
Posts: 5

### Re: Limericks

Sorry if this one sounds a little offensive/violent.

Limericks are extremely amazing
They are, of course, highly entertaining
But if you don't like them
Then jump off the Big Ben
Because you seem very irritating.

~
Back with a vengeance.

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## #13 2013-03-23 10:27:39

Nehushtan
Member
Registered: 2013-03-09
Posts: 912
Website

### Re: Limericks

There once was a man named Jhough
Who lived in a place called Whough.
He said: Simple! They both rhyme with Zhough.

By the way sorobans ones are awesome.

Last edited by Nehushtan (2013-03-23 10:28:18)

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