Math Is Fun Forum

"My wife said to me, "I want to be cremated." I said,
         "How about Tuesday?"
        -- Buddy Hackett
       
        Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it
        doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
        -- Mickey Rooney
       
         I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for
         marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
        -- Rita Rudner
       
        Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with
        friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the
        other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
        -- Anonymous
       
        My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
        -- Rodney Dangerfield
       
        Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat
        in Europe.
        -- Jackie Mason
       
        Marriage can be viewed as the waiting room for death.
        -- Mike Myers
       
        A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
        -- Michel de Montaigne
       
        After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin;
        they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
        -- Hemant Joshi

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring,
        and suffering.
        -- Anonymous
       
        "My wife said to me, "I want to be cremated." I said, "How
        about Tuesday?"
        -- Buddy Hackett
       
       
        "When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than
        to let him keep her." - Sacha Guitry.
       
        "Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his
        wife." - Groucho Marx.

        I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get
        my wife to go swimming.
        -- Jimmy Carter