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Doctor: "I am not exactly sure of the cause. I think it could be due to alcohol."
Patient: "That's okay. I'll come back when you are sober."
* * *
A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left.
The chemist takes a shot and misses five feet to the right.
The statistician yells, "We got 'em!”
* * *
Q: Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
A: He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.
* * *
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
Some poems rhyme.
Some poems don't.
* * *
A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.
When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, the nurse said, "No change yet."
* * *
It appears to me that if one wants to make progress in mathematics, one should study the masters and not the pupils. - Niels Henrik Abel.
Nothing is better than reading and gaining more and more knowledge - Stephen William Hawking.
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