Math Is Fun Forum

wow.it would be funny if this was in high school musical 3 (not that they have one yet.)

A man sits down at a restaurant and looks at the menu. He tells the waiter, "I think I will have the turtle soup." The waiter leaves, but the man changes his mind to pea soup.He yells to the waiter, "Hold the turtle, make it pea!"
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A man tries to sell his neighbor a new dog."This is a talking dog," he said."And you can have him for £5." "Who do think you're kidding with this talking dog-stuff?"said the neighbor."There's no such animal."Suddenly the dog looked up with tears in his eyes."Please buy me, sir," he pleaded. "This man is cruel. He never buys me a meal, never baths me, never takes me for for walks. I used to be the riches trick dog in Asia. I preformed before kings. I was in the army and were decorated 10 times.""Hey!"said the neighbor. "He can talk. Why sell him just for £5?""Because," said the seller,"I'm getting tired of all his darn lies.":)
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At a football match one day a man tried to get into the game with a gorilla."Look," said a cop,"I saw you with him yesterday and told you to take him to a zoo.""Yes I did that, and then we went to the skating ring and had a meal. So today I thought he might like to see a football match.":P
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Barber:Your hair needs cutting badly.
Costumer: No, it needs cutting nicly. You cut it badly last time.:lol:
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Our small grocery store had a rule for children returning soft-drink bottles:NO BOTTLES ACCEPTED AFTER FIVE O'CLOCK. One day near closing time at 6:30, four young children arrived with bottles. Wanting to put a stop to this, I sternly asked each child if he was aware of the  rules. Three shook their heads no, but the youngest said he knew. "Why then," I asked, "have you brought me these bottles?" "I can't tell time yet,".he said.
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My mother used to work in a supermarket. One morning, a little lost boy walked up to her with big, sad eyes and told her he was lost.Mom said "Don't worry.We'll find your......mom.They looked  aisle after aisle.She told him to look very carfully and asked "Do you see your mom?" "Nope, I just keep seeing my dad."
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PLEASE!COMMENT!:)